If you’re a woman, you probably have at least one story of a time when a man (or a woman) said something completely offensive to you.
While some comments are pretty harmless (we all sometimes say things without thinking!), other times, the comments can be downright concerning.
Recently, on a popular social media platform, someone asked:
“Women of reddit, what is something completely offensive a man has said to you, thinking it was a compliment to you?”
Sometimes you just have to laugh at the audacity (so you don’t end up crying).
Taking Advantage of the Situation
Some comments people shared were downright terrifying and illegal.
We can’t post the worst ones here, and some had to be edited slightly to make them suitable for print.
One woman shared: “Took an Uber ride home at 3am once and the driver told me ‘women fall asleep in the back of my Uber all the time. I could [take advantage of] them but I don’t.'”
Another shared: “Not me, but someone I knew who worked at a board game store had a customer come up to her and say, ‘Man you look like you’d be fun to r—.'”
These weren’t isolated incidents, either. Still another shared, “As a 21 year old female I had a (40+) man tell me, ‘You better watch out. I might r— ya” after telling him my age when he asked at a pub. I don’t know why he thought that was a compliment.”
Shall We Move This Somewhere Else?
Yes, we know it’s “not all men.” But the number of women who had similar stories to share was downright shocking.
One woman shared, “One time a cab driver told me I looked ‘kidn–able.'”
Another shared, “I’ve had men tell me the exact opposite – I don’t look ‘kidn–able’ because I’d definitely put up… a fight. And when I say men – yes I do mean that more than one has told me this – several years apart too.”
Age is Just a Number
You would think we, as women, would have some time before we have to deal with these inappropriate comments.
Yet, many women reported dealing with them at a concerningly young age.
One woman shared, “When I was 14, I sat at a bus stop. A man sat down next to me and said, ‘You know, I’m 68 now, but I’m still into young pretty girls like you.’ Made the hair at the back of my neck stand up and I immediately took off. Since then I could never view an old man as just a cute grandpa.”
Another woman shared, “A teacher in high school told me I was ‘every ped—–‘s dream” when I got my braces put on at 18 because I looked like I was 12.”
New Job Opportunity
Telling a woman she’s pretty could be well-received.
Unfortunately, some men feel the need to use more colorful (and completely inappropriate) language.
One woman shared, “I had my colleague coming up to me saying I should start OF to start earning extra… had to do double take. Did I hear right? And he whips out his phone and gives me a whole presentation on why I should just start an OF… I was speechless and just blankly staring — Is this actually happening? We don’t talk at work, and I was just minding my business on a break when he approached. I expected it to be work related.”
Unwanted Attention
That being said, many times, men should simply keep their comments to themselves.
Many women shared how men had made unwanted comments toward them, often out of the blue.
One woman shared how a man told her, “You’re so hot, I’d love to make you my secretary.”
Another shared, “A middle aged man told me I had ‘great birthing hips’. I was 16.”
Still another shared, “Out of absolutely nowhere my 30-something year old boss told me that he thought I’d hit my ‘peak attractiveness’ at 22… if I didn’t gain “anymore” weight. I was 18 years old, 5’7” and 130 lbs at the time.”
Some things just don’t need to be said.
More Than Just a Pretty Face
Do men realize that women are more than just husband-serving, baby-creating machines? Obviously some do. Others… we’re not sure.
One woman shared, “I told my uncle that I was in an accelerated doctoral program to get my PhD. His response? ‘Oh, that’s great! That way you’ll still have time to get married and have kids when you graduate with that fancy degree!'”
One man shared the following experience about his daughter, “The first time my neighbor met my daughter, he told me and my wife that ‘She’s so pretty, they’d pay $30,000 for her in Miami.’ Like dude, stay away.”
Others compared women to farm animals with comments including: “You’re the prettiest piece of cattle I’ve ever seen” and “We should breed you.”
I Didn’t See That Coming!
Some comments seemed like they should be compliments… if not for the fact that the men seemed so surprised.
Many women shared the completely unnecessary, eye-roll-inducing comments they had to put up with, including:
- “You’re hot for a Jewish girl”
- “You’re very pretty for a black girl”
- “You look good for your age”
- “You’re strong for a girl.”
- “You don’t sweat much for a fat chick!”
- “I’m surprised, when I first saw you I had no idea you were actually smart”
- “You are really beautiful for being so tall.”
- “You’re really smart for a woman”
If Only Things Were Different…
Other men skipped the compliments and went straight for the criticism, often while acting surprised that the woman wasn’t flattered.
Women shared critical comments they received… even though they did not ask and did not care.
- “You would looks so much prettier if you smiled more.”
- “I feel like we are already in a relationship but if you promise to lose weight we can make it official.”
- “You’d be so much cuter if you just tried.”
- “Smile more, you look better that way.”
- “If you were shorter, I’d date you.”
- “You’d be so much hotter if you had tattoos”
Uh… Thanks?
Thankfully, some comments were likely more thoughtless than malicious. They’re still annoying, but we might give them a pass.
Annoying comments women received include:
- “Wow, you fight like a man!”
- “Usually I like smaller girls, but there’s just something about you”
- “Why do you look so much prettier in photos than real life?’”
- “How in the world are you still single?”
- “I don’t care what other people say, I think you’re nice.”
- “You’re almost perfect… just gotta work on those obliques”
- “You look better in the dark.”
- “You would be prettier without your tattoos.”
I Guess It’s Not All Bad
While some comments warrant a call to the cops, thankfully, some women were able to find the humor in the more benign “compliments” without letting them ruin their day.
One woman shared, “When someone says something really stupid, I feel grateful that they have warned me. Stupid people are worse than pillagers. I don’t ever try to wise them up, it just makes them better at being stupid.”
That’s one way to look at things!
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Brittany Ann is an ECPA bestselling author and founder of Equipping Godly Women and Monetize My Ministry. She’s also a Christian speaker, podcaster, and conference host. Her work has been featured on numerous TV, radio, and online ministries, including CBN, MSN, Christianity Today, Evangelical Alliance, Patheos, Crosswalk, and more.
